49 - 21

Okay, so maybe it wasn't quite this bad. But it was close.

The annual Jews-Christians football game occured last weekend in a slop that would have kept a rugby team indoors. I suppose the Jews Christians designation is an arbitrary means to divide the teams but it's not like we can shoot free throws to divide ourselves so whatever works. We use the terms a little loosely as no one had to provide an attendance record for their particular church/synagogue or each team might have lost a scrappy player or two.

We played 3 on 3 (7 on 7 if egos are counted) two hand touch and the obvious advantage went to the pair who brought cleats. It was my first appearance in the annual spectacle replacing CR and the Red Dirt Band which was a huge benefit to the Crafty Veteran and Old School Nasty mainly becuase I brought my own shoes and did not require mid drive smoke breaks. The other team consisted of the Intern, a scrappy attorney, and a bartender whose cutthroat defense included showing off the boys mid pass in a sort of nasty shock treatment that rendered the flying pigskin irrelevant compared to the alternative of a sharp cringe and diverting of the eyes.

Anyone who watched Boise St. Little Giants/Rookie of the Year/Mighty Ducks their way past Oklahoma would be under the understandable misconception that trick plays had never been so cleverly utilized. These people were not at Westminister to see the Christians run an unprecedented double reverse pass/hook and ladder which netted us an entire 8 yards. This was followed by a surely illegal little number where it was my job to fire the football as hard as possible at the head of the Crafty Veteran resting on the shoulders of the Crafty Veteran ten yards in front of me. Simultaneously, and Old School Nasty cut is being made across the back of the end zone to catch the pass that the Crafty vet deflects backwards over is head. Did it work? Of course not, but we scored on a subsequent play and won the muddy debacle 49-21. A follow up game would also see us hoist the "avoidance of eternal damnation" trophy 21-14. I went home with a renewed self esteem and predict a year full of taunting in store for the Intern, Scrappy Attorney, and Shock and Awe Bartender.

Congratulations are in order to Old School Nasty for his Nasty engagement to his Old School Lady. I only request that you remember the ol Rail Bird (and other free men) when deciding bridesmaids and the guest list.